"I enjoy your company"

Olivia came into my office and asked me this question: What can you recommend to people that find it difficult to use words of love?

This is a very common question in my practice. For some people, simply saying "I love you" is ridiculous because, according to them, love is expressed through acts, not words. It is true that loving words are hollow when they are not accompanied by loving behavior. Still, some individuals have difficulty expressing their feelings because their parents never did, and thus they never learned how either. Such people might find it easier to state their feelings in a less emotional way, such as "I enjoy your company" or "I like being with you." But we can't deny that expressing what we feel is a way of feeding the relationship, so when one partner holds back in their verbal expression of love, that can leave the other feeling hungry and unsatisfied. Words of love are the expression of our most intimate feelings and desires, and using them helps us feel closer to each other.

-Dr. Ana Nogales